I've been here for too long

I walked in this morning after a small breakfast, still hungry. While putting my lunch away, I noticed a large container of dill pickle spears. The type provided in bulk by BBQ joints when they cater. Exactly the type of food that lingers in the fridge near the grad student cubicles.

Ignoring the complete grossness of consuming pickles alongside cheap instant coffee, I immediately wondered how long they'd been there and if they'd be safe to eat. I snapped to the conclusion that, well, they are pickles and are therefore pickled after all.

I caught myself just as my hand lifted towards the container, shivered, collected my instant coffee, and moved on.