P-Value Extravaganza

A ridiculous (and informative) final project by the very talented Jesse Kelly for Bill Press' statistics course:

Sleeping Bag by Jordan Moser

Our friend Jordan released his first album a few weeks back. My wife Michelle has used his work in her choreography. We're both huge fans. Jordan's music is great for a crowded bar or a quiet evening. His lyrics are nothing short of excellent. For $7 you can go pick up a copy. The words in his song The Curtains quite literally always give me chills:

She calls it walking out
but that's not what it's about.
We don't see eye to eye
and there's no tellin' why.
She don't say nothing now.
She's got her shit all figured out.
The real matter is
who's gonna keep the curtains?

Barry was eighty-five.
Kathy, his lovin' wife,
never thought in a million years
she would be standing here,
calling the funeral home,
going to bed alone.
She's gotta face all the relatives.
He left her with the curtains.

Don't know if love's a gift
or just something that someone did
and couldn't stop talking about
until none could do without.
The smell of the open air
as it drifts through your lover's hair...
Doesn't every love come to this?
Who's gonna keep the curtains?

The dust underneath the bed,
the terrible things she said
like "give me my money back"
prepare for the final act.
And when the big red curtains close
she turns to the life she chose.
But I didn't ask for this.
Who's gonna keep the curtains?

The Curtains by Jordan Moser from his album Sleeping Bag
Released 3 May 2012 by Albino Crow Music
Available from http://albinocrowmusic.bandcamp.com/album/sleeping-bag
Lyrics by Jordan Moser. All rights reserved.